Your 2013 National Young Writers’ Festival Planner

Founded in 1998, the National Young Writers' Festival is this year celebrating its sweet sixteenth. Of course this doesn't mean they'll be spending the whole festival talking about blogs and feelings while chugging cheap champagne. Although, come to think of it, there is this panel on blogging and this thing all about feelings. And okay, sure, this fake formal is bound to have some Passion Pop on hand.

But contrary to the testimony of anyone who's actually met a 16-year-old, being around for that long does give you a bit of wisdom. NYWF consistently delivers an appealing free program and offers amazing insight, advice and assistance to young creatives from all over the country. Like migration, hundreds of wide-eyed literary types descend on Newcastle for it each year — Moleskines in hand.

From October 3-6, this year's festival will host 75 free events featuring over 100 young artists including the likes of Tom Ballard, Lorelei Vashti, Benjamin Law and Anna Krien. Over just three days, this can all be a bit overwhelming. NYWF offers frank and honest discussions with the best and most relatable voices in Australian writing, but how can we take it in with everybody talking at once? With the program just released and our fingers poised over Jetstar's 'confirm' button, here's a little of what you can expect from the blossoming festival — Passion Pop and all.

Workshops and Panels

First and foremost, NYWF is a time for the country's up-and-comers to get together and hone their craft. Ever feel like the lit nerd or the outsider? Don't worry. Everyone sitting next to you at this festival fawned over Vonnegut in high school; for these three days no one's going to give you shit for doing an arts degree.

Writing can often be an arduous process so the best events are the ones that force you to put pen to paper. Get each morning started with the Everyday Flash Fiction workshop — breeze down from the seaside, pick up a coffee, and let Scum, The Lifted Brow, and Seizure put a (metaphorical) gun to your head to get you writing. You'll feel productive for the rest of the day, I promise. Plus, if you pen a really touching love poem you can head along to the Speed Writing event and share it. That's right, it's a mix between speed dating and writing — it should be fun because writers are really outgoing and not awkward at all.

For the shier amongst us, there will also be a series of more introspective workshops: why do we write, why do we want awards — hell, why do we even go to these festivals? If those are a bit too Inception for you, there's also a handy session called How to not be a douche. Once that's covered, there's not too much else you'll need to know.

Parties

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, and the same goes for writers. Just look at Jack Kerouac. That's not a great example, but you get the idea. As much as NYWF is a great place to learn, it's also an excellent place to get loose. This isn't class. The panellists won't care if you slur a question over your pint of beer. Actually, I wouldn't take the chance of that at the douche workshop — you'd really be asking for it. But hey, it's spring, you're by the sea, and most events are held in licensed venues — you should take advantage of it.

At last year's launch, The Lifted Brow put a naked man on the stage to welcome in their new edition; there was a big party at the Great Northern themed 'Hip Hop Safari'; and it was very much encouraged to bring longnecks and bottles of tequila to the Late Night Read. This year will offer similar opportunities with another mixed bag launch, a session of oddly specific '90s literary trivia, and the most excellent idea of all, a Paranormal Formal.

Even with all the civilised panels and writing workshops, I promise the best chances you have of wooing your favourite writer or editor will be as they're dressed as a magician drinking goon punch out of a plastic cup.

Readings

What would a writers festival be without hearing some of these much-praised words spoken aloud? My highlight of last year's festival was the Late Night Read — an intimate event where writers came together to share their work with midnight beers and mayhem. Lawrence Leung read a story about touching his housemate's underwear, Ben Law talked about old penises, and Tom Walker told an animated story about time travel — it was pretty great.

This year, the event is back, with each night having a designated theme: Closer Each Day, Home and Away, Hi, Heartbreak, and Everybody Needs Good Neighbours. I can't say for sure that all the works will be about primetime Australian drama, but I also can't say they won't be.

Sydney group Penguin Plays Rough will also be bringing their readings event to the festival, taking a select audience into the tunnels of Fort Scratchley. Underground, you can hear seven writers tell stories of Australia's military history. If you like your entertainment a bit lighter, there will also be readings about first times, trolls and a three-part exploration of memory.

The Great Unknown

Most things at writers festivals are pretty straight forward. The panels usually oscillate somewhere between 'Who Even Are We?' and 'Where Are We Going?', and the parties often turn into cringe-worthy soirees designed for 'networking' — the single worst word in the world, perhaps only with the exception of 'moist'. NYWF is different. Maybe it's just the sea-air, but things are a little more weird and a lot more fun. The element of the unknown or unexpected is what makes the festival so great.

There's the Paranormal Formal and the Speed Writing — there's the 90s literary trivia. But there's a whole host of odd things to look out for over your three-day stay. To start with, there's a real-life sleepover. Yep, you actually have the opportunity to don a onesie and play truth or dare with your favourite writers. You can even sleep alongside them if they're cool with it — seriously, please get their consent.

If that's not weird enough, Freya Wright Brough is going to be making you feel guilty about your lack of productivity by writing for 24 hours straight, and there's a workshop dedicated to scribbling all over Gina Rinehart's biography.

After all this, you'll find the best events by meeting some new friends and stumbling into something unexpected. NYWF is only one element of the This is Not Art Festival after all, so hold tight, you haven't even heard the half of it.

Photographs: Lucien Alperstein and Lucy Parakhina