Overview
If movies have taught us one thing, it's that you shouldn't feed gremlins after midnight. If movies have taught us a second thing, it's that hardened criminals are no match for a precocious eight-year-old played by Macaulay Culkin. But if movies have taught us a third thing, it's that you should never, ever, under any circumstances go into the water. Because that's where Jaws lives. Do you want to get eaten by Jaws? Didn't think so.
Unfortunately, despite it basically being a straight-up fact that anyone who dips so much as a toe into the murky depths will 100 percent get eaten by a ravenous 25-foot shark, the lunatics at Golden Age Cinema are still insisting on screening Jaws in an outdoor pool right by the harbour. In partnership with Art & About Sydney, Golden Age will screen Steven Spielberg's quintessential summer blockbuster crucial public safety announcement on back-to-back evenings in late January 2016 at Andrew (Boy) Charlton Pool on Woolloomooloo Bay.
Tickets go on sale in November, with the option for floating or 'beachside' seating. The screening will be accompanied by ocean-inspired beverages and fresh seafood, as well as guest talks designed to dispel myths about our toothy aquatic friends. Although frankly, headlines like this aren't exactly helping their case.
In the meantime, Golden Age are also hosting a car park screening of Blade Runner in late November, complete with food, music, artwork and a futuristic night market. It promises to be a transportive event, even (or especially) if you fear self-aware AI as much as you do sharks.