Your Itinerary: Talk Like a Pirate Day in Brisbane
Talk, eat and booze like a pirate.
Ahoy there! September 19 is International Talk Like a Pirate Day, a holiday conceived by mateys John Bauer and Mark Summers of Oregon, USA in the mid-'90s. After a plug from American columnist Dave Barry in 2002, a joke between friends grew into an international phenomenon, where ‘arrr’ becomes a universally understood term for a day.
In Australia, Talk Like a Pirate Day takes a charitable turn. Talklikeapirateday.org raises a fine loot and then gives it to Childhood Cancer Support, assisting the families of little pirates going through cancer treatment. Share your spoils, mateys!
Here are our recommendations for how Brisbane pirates can spend International Talk Like a Pirate Day next Thursday. In the words of Bauer and Summers, “Silliness is the holiday’s best selling point”. So strap on your peg leg and eye patch, switch your Facebook language to Pirate, and off we go!
START THE DAY
Avast! Didn’t your mother ever tell you that brunch is the most important meal of the day? A good pirate kicks off a long day of mischief with something from Chester Street Bakery & Bar. With its shiny blue wood-fire oven and an all day brunch menu, this is the place pillage some pancakes and throw back some grog. Jug of Bloody Mary? Aye aye!
MID MORNING
Every pirate needs to be able to sniff out treasure and practice makes perfect. Have your mateys hide your treasure of choice around New Farm Park and hunt it down. Try not to scare too many children. If your treasure hunt works up an appetite, sit down with your crew for a picnic. Ye could even try some of the recipes from the Bake Like a Pirate guide on talklikeapirateday.org.
Treasure hunt doesn’t float your boat? Perhaps ye need to get your sea legs back. Catch the City Cat to South Bank – the trip’s not quite long enough to risk scurvy, but just enough to avoid being labeled a blasted landlubber. Smartly now, lass or laddie!
Once you’ve reached the hallowed shores of South Bank, pay a visit to the Maritime Museum. There ye can gaze upon some seafarin’ history, including photographs (look out for your pirate ancestors), artwork, and maritime artefacts.
MIDDAY
If your last few expeditions have yielded plentiful booty, maybe it’s time to spoil your pirate self with a scenic lunch cruise on the Kookaburra Queen. She’s been the grand wench of the Brisbane River for more than 25 years and is a true icon of this great city. Commandeering is not encouraged. If your sea legs have failed and some solid ground is sought, make for either the South Bank Surf Club or Merthyr Bowls club, depending on where ye olde compass points you. At both places you can feast on oysters and fish and chips with a water view worthy of pirate kings.
AFTERNOON
After lunch it must be high time to walk the plank… straight into the sea monster-free waters of Streets Beach at South Bank. With its tranquil blue waters, white sandy shores and lush surrounds, you’ll feel like you’ve woken up on a deserted tropical island. For the active pirate types, set towards the river once more for kayaking at Riverlife at the bottom of the Kangaroo Point Cliffs. There be no need to abseil (unless that’s the sort of thing that blows your hornpipe) – just follow the walkway along the river. The kayaking tours take you past landmarks like the Botanical Gardens and the Story Bridge. Now there’s a beauty!
DINNER
A real pirate needs real meaty sustenance – arrr! And what be better after a long day of (nonviolent) pillaging than roast pork carved from the whole pig at Alfred and Constance? Your dinner will be complete with a tropical cocktail from the upstairs Tiki bar, where a model of the famous historical beacon of piracy - Jack Sparrow - shall greet ye.
NIGHT CAP
The best pirates never have an early night, not when there’s rum to be drunk. Get your crew to prohibition-style hideaway The Walrus Club in Auchenflower. There, ye can soak up the subterranean ambience, enjoy a Cuban cigar and choose from over 300 rum varieties to finish Talk Like a Pirate Day 2013 the way it should be. Arrr!
